Fact.

Case Closed.

Horror Media Ruined My Life.

I'm not going to pretend anymore.

I love scary things.

I try to deny it. I tell people, "No. I think it's lame." 

"Nah, not really into it. I only like a couple things" etc. etc....

...it's a lie I've told myself. I've come to this conclusion today while standing in line at the store (gotta entertain myself somehow. Christmas lines suck). 

I realized, however, that it has completely ruined my life. I can't walk down the hallway or hear the doorbell ring without fear. Everywhere is a threat. A lovely hike through the woods has turned into a battle for my life and sanity. 

For Example, even if the world looks like this:

I see it like this:

fear is a bad abstract painting.

I thought someone was knocking on my door today. Most people would be like "Oh? a visitor!" In my head my monologue went a little as follows:
"..."
*knock...knock*
"DEAR SWEET GOD ABOVE IM SORRY FOR EVERYTHING I DONT HAVE ANYTHING HERE I CAN USE FOR A WEAPON THINK STACI DONT LOOK OUT THE WINDOW GRAB SOMETHING TO DEFEND YOURSELF DEAR GO- oh wait it's the cat."

or is it.

dammit.

[Insert Pointless Blog Here]

yeah haven't thought about anything entertaining.

So here's a narwhal with lame text

And Now for the Presentation:

TODAYS PRESENTATION:

STUPID LYRICS BY RIHANNA:

"Never, have I ever, been a size 10 in my whole life."

"Hold me like a pillow."

"I want you to love me like I'm a hot guy"

"Cause it's raining men, fat bitches."

"Eenie, meanie, miney, mo. Catch a player by the toe"

"I may be dumb, but I'm not stupid"

"While you're getting your cry on, I'm getting my fly on."

"Ride this beat, beat, beat like a pony."

"Baby I'm a, oh, baby I'm a, oh, baby I'm a, oh, baby I'm a, oh, baby I'm a, oh, baby I'm a, oh, baby I'm a, oh, baby I'm a, eh eh eh"

"I know you're around like the ice cream man"

"I wish I was in a flick and I ain't talking movies"

Why Anime is Stupid and Awesome

So I enjoy a good anime once in a while. I used to go to anime conventions (insert mocking, pointing, hysterical laughter right effin' here) and I have to admit I thoroughly enjoyed them. It was good to get out and be around a huge group of fellow nerds. Contrary to popular belief, there are somewhat normal people there. I met my best friend Leanna at an anime convention, and a lot of other good friends. 

I wouldn't call myself, however, an anime/video game nerd. I do enjoy video games, and I do enjoy some anime, but I am in no way obsessive or crazy about them. Those are the freaks that scare me. I usually hid under convention tables from them, because no, I did not see that last episode that came out yesterday. I actually have a job, and go to school, and function in a normal society. :D

However, today I decided to sit down and watch my favorite anime's second season, Kuroshitsuji. I haven't been able to see what is goin' on in season II, so I'm trying to catch up. However, watching it made me realize that anime is both 

insanely stupid and 

so awesome at the same time.

Allow me to give some picture reference.

To demonstrate how stupid anime really is, I'm literally only pulling from ONE EPISODE ONLY.

except these sheep. They're just cute.

ANYWAYS:

BOOB CAMEOS

I have no idea why anime has this excessive need to portray women with the biggest boobs.

Especially with guns. Guns are important. Boobs and Guns.

in the last episode I watched, a big, stupid music box made everyone at this Victorian banquet turn into blood thirsty zombies. Randomly. No reason given.

There is blood shooting out of this woman's nose. Notice how the two bastards next to her pay that no mind. Usually that requires some serious medical attention.

this is a twelve year old cross dresser. He's a main character.

....

[insert closing remarks about how anime is just so bloody awful]

Bloody Ghost Eyes

Last night I had a difficult time getting to bed thinking about everything that has happened over the past semester, which then lead into situations that happened over my entire college life. Things replayed in my head over and over to the point where I literally slammed my head into the headboard of my bed because I was entirely frustrated.

When I was finally able to fall asleep, I had dreams about being haunted by bloody ghost demons in an inescapable amusement park attraction.

Last night sucked.

HOWEVER!

I woke up this morning and the whole experience got me thinking. If I died and it was possible, who would I be a guardian angel to and who would I haunt the hell out of?

I think I'd be a good guardian angel.

leanna disapproves of my angelness

It would be awesome. I'd float around and protect my friends from harm and sprinkle magical glitter on them while they slept. 

However, I realized that there's a lot of people I'd probably haunt the almighty hell out of.

fohawk man rules.

That's what you get for f*cking with me.

In conclusion,

If you don't know if I would guard you or haunt you,

I'd probably haunt you.

The Joys of Living with a Crazy Rockstar Dad

It all started around 5:00pm. I'm sitting on my bed, on the computer, unfolding an epic quest on the Sims 2 to get Rebecca to fall in love with Eric, and Rebecca's brother to fall in love with Bruce so he has a boyfriend after Randy cheats on him... THIS IS IMPORTANT BUSINESS.

My father comes into my room and blatantly states, "Flatfoot 56 is sleeping over here tonight after their gig. Just FYI."

...... like this is a normal occurrence... just... bands sleeping all over my house?

What? is this. My parents are now yelling at me to vacuum. 

I have no idea what is going on.

I am Phone Stupid.

So I have come to the conclusion I am completely incapable of understanding how/why to use a phone. My dad recently upgraded my phone from a "THIS BUTTON CALLS. THIS BUTTON TEXTS." to a "OMGTHEREARE4058406849869849BUTTONSANDSWITCHESANDTOUCHSCREENSUPERDUPERAPSANDFUNOMG"

Needless to say I have no idea how to use it.

I'd much rather talk in person. This way I'm able to see the person and actually focus. When I call people, I tend to be preoccupied and go on a massive A.D.D trip and forget why I called the person and run my mouth more than I usually do on a daily basis. I usually have just one question that turns into a 20 minutes conversation of me yelling and the other person left half dead from the abuse of the English language. I'm pretty sure my friends dread answering the phone when I call.

I remember this one time (or several) I called Allison and it turned into a big thing of me vomiting bad grammar. I don't remember what the question I had was.

lolcan'tdrawtelephones

How to Handle

Recently I've had to put myself in a lot of scary situations. I'm glad to be home taking a break from all the hype, but it's allowed me to have time to sit down and really think of how to handle situations that cause myself to become extremely paranoid or scared.

I thought about the denial process.

That never works.

I don't care who you are if you think that works you are in denial that the denial process blows.

I thought about the acceptance process.

That doesn't work either.

Just accepting everything and "facing your fear" is stupid. It makes people depressed.

I've come up with a solution. I think the acceptance process is perfectly healthy if you incorporate one more aspect: Anytime you have to do something horrifyingly scary, just pretend you have a furious dragon behind you and the only person he likes is yourself. :D :D :D

srsly. can't draw dragons.

LOL WUT IS DIZ BLOG

I decided to start a public blog. I feel like there are too many ridiculous situations that occur in my daily life that it would be a shame not to document.

I also think too much.

This past semester has been an emotional hell. I'm pretty sure my brain exploded and now my eyes are leaking blood. The only way to explain is to draw a picture:

Hopefully I'll be able to relax, but I'm pretty sure I've snapped. Tiny things are starting to become a bother. Example: My cat is sleeping on my bed. I've never been so upset in my life.

at least he's cute.